Posts Tagged ‘Influence’

Most Powerful Word Used to Influence Others

The most powerful word you can use to influence others is the word CONTEXT.  Context is not the word you should be using, but rather the strategy on how to influence others.

What you have to say is not powerful.  The power comes from positioning your ideas and offers in the CONTEXT of what’s important to the listener.  This may sound like a minor point to you, but it is the GREATEST DISTINCTION of what separates the most influential people from others.

Here’s an example.  Scott Nadell, Director of Sales for Mextrx LLC, a third party biller in New York specializing in workers compensation and no fault receivables, called me up after reading Lead, Sell or Get Out of the Way.  He asked me how could he do a better job of opening his client’s minds to listen to what he has to say.  He described his clients as being closed minded and downright rude to him.

I asked him how he started off his calls.  He said since they only give him a couple of minutes, he goes straight into how he can do their billing better and more efficiently.  All of a sudden, the gates come down. Office managers hearing this start thinking about the possibility of having to fire employees because of technology gains. Doctors don’t want to get near this issue either.  No one is listening.

I told Scott he needed to develop the relationship first so his clients are not fearful of him and then present his offering in the CONTEXT of the problems they are trying to solve.

He started going in to prospect calls with the mindset of having a conversation.  Asking about the challenges they are having in billing, getting them to open up.  Then, he presented his offering in the CONTEXT of how he can help them solve those problems without ever talking about laying anyone off.  He concentrated on his company’s technology and statistics of improvement gains similar practices have achieved from working with Scott.

All of a sudden, Scott started having better conversation, uncovered new opportunities and closed more deals.

If you are trying to influence anyone in life, customers, family members, friends, students, colleagues, etc.—remember it is not the message that counts.  It is the CONTEXT in how you deliver the message that makes all the difference in whether your message lands with impact and is acted on!

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Appreciate the Living, Not Just the Dearly Departed

Something happened this weekend that reminds us all that we should not only appreciate the ultimate sacrifices made by our brave men and women fighting for our freedom, but also take time to thank the living and show our appreciation for all that they have done to help us achieve our successes.

The incident I am referring to is the untimely passing of the legendary child actor Gary Coleman. The child star of Different Strokes stormed into our living rooms in the early 1980’s, broke down racial barriers and touched the hearts of many with his loveable and sassy personality. Unfortunately, after the show Different Strokes went off the air, Gary’s fortunes came to an abrupt end and the rest of his life was saddled with financial and personal woes.

You may ask how this is different from all the other stories of child actors who could not smoothly transition into adult life. What’s different is not so much Gary’s story, but the untold story of how his loved ones wished they had repaired their relations with him and his wife before it was too late.

Gary sued his parents and manager for allegedly mishandling his earnings from Different Strokes. Estranged from his parents at the time of his pre-mature death on Friday, his mother told the Associated Press that she had prayed that “nothing like this would happen before we could sit with Gary and Shannon and say, ‘We’re here and we love you.’ ”

We have Memorial Day to thank and remember those who made the Ultimate Sacrifice. We have Thanksgiving to give thanks for all of our riches.

We have 362 days a year to thank everyone who has made a difference in our lives and to simply say we love you. Use each and every one of those days to give thanks. Saying thank you and showing appreciation while people are alive allows them to experience your true heartfelt feelings. Don’t wait until it’s too late and you are then forced to say “I wish I only said…..”